...as a translator.

The US Pledge of Allegiance:

I pledge Allegiance to the flag
of the United States of America
and to the Republic for which it stands,
one nation under God, indivisible,
with Liberty and Justice for all.

After BabelFish got done with it:

Me with the flag of United States of America the republic which stops, the nation, all in hazard freedom and process, it promises a loyalty in the shoes lower part.

"shoes lower part" is AWESOME. Well, if it can't do any better than that, I think I'd be reluctant to use it.  It appears to be appropriately named: [highlight]Babel[/highlight]fish.  LOLI've used babelfish before, and the translation was kinda sucky.
Try using it to translate a poem to another language and then back, the results are quite funny.It's probably the fish Dilbert.This is all the ones that got away learned.
It really destroyed the preamble to Evangeline.My all time favorite.
                                    
                                       Evangeline

THIS are the forest primeval. The murmuring pines and the hemlocks, Bearded with moss, and in garments green, indistinct in the twilight, score like Druids or eld, with VOICES sad and prophetic, score like harpers hoar, with beards that rest on of their bosoms. Loud from its rocky caverns, the deep-voiced neighboring ocean Speaks, and in emphasis disconsolate answers the wail or the forest. This are the forest primeval; but where are the HEARTS that beneath it Leaped like the roe, when he hears in the woodland the voice or the huntsman? Where are the thatch-roofed village, the home or Acadian farmers   One whose lives glided on like rivers that water the woodlands, Darkened by shadows or earth, but reflecting an image or heaven? Waste are those pleasant farms, and the farmers forever departed! Scattered like dust and leaves, when the mighty blasts or October Seize them, and whirl them aloft, and sprinkle them far o'er the ocean. Naught but tradition remains or the beautiful village or Grand-Pre. Ye WHO believe in affection that hopes, and endures, and is patient, Ye WHO believe in the beauty and strength or woman's devotion, trick to the mournful tradition still sung by the pines or the forest; Trick to a Tale or Love in Acadie, home or the happy.

Look below at what it did to Uncle Remus. :-?

The Wonderful Tar baby story ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "DIDN'T the fox more never catch the rabbit, Uncle Remus?" asked the little boy the NEXT evening. "He come mighty nigh it, honey, sho's you fount Brer Fox did. One day atter Brer Rabbit fool ' in wid dat calamus the root, Brer Fox went more ter wuk EN got ' in some tar, EN mixes it wid some turkentime, EN fixed UP A contrapshun w'at he call A Tar baby, EN he tuck dish yer Tar babies EN he sot ' it into de big road, EN the he lay off into de bushes of fer ton lake what de news wuz gwine more ter. EN he didn't hatter WAIT long, more nudder, kaze bimeby here come Brer Rabbit pacin ' down de road lippity clippity, clippity lippity December ez sassy ez A jay bird. Brer Fox, he lay low. Brer Rabbit come prancin ' ' long twel he spy de Tar Tar-Baby, EN the he fotch UP on his behime legs like he wuz ' stonished. De Tar baby, she sot, she did, EN Brer Fox, he lay low. "`Mawnin '!' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee `nice more wedder dis mawnin ', ' sezee. "Tar baby ain't sayin ' ', EN Brer Fox he lay low. "`How duz yo ' sym'tums seem more ter segashuate?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. "Brer Fox, he would sign his eye slow, to EN lay low, EN de Tar Tar-Baby, she ain't sayin ' '. "`How you come on, that? Is you deaf?' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. ` Kaze if you is, I kin more holler more louder, ' sezee. "Tar baby stay quietly, EN Brer Fox, he lay low. "`You it stucco UP, dat's w'at you is, ' says Brer Rabbit, sezee, ` EN I'm gwine more ter kyore you, dat's w'at I'm A gwine of ter DO, ' sezee. "Brer Fox, he more sorter chuckle in his stummick, he did, but Tar baby ain't sayin ' '. "`I'm gwine more ter larn you how ter talc more ter ' spectubble folks ef hit's de read ' ack, ' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee. ` Ef you don't take off dat EN tell ME howdy, I'm gwine ter bus ' you wide open, ' sezee. "Tar baby stay quietly, EN Brer Fox, he lay low. "Brer Rabbit keep on axin ' ' in, EN de Tar Tar-Baby, she keep on sayin ' ', twel present'y Brer Rabbit draw bake wid his fis ', he did, EN blip he tuck ' it side it de head. Right dar's whar he broke his merlasses jug. His fis ' stucco, EN he can't pull loose. De tar hilt ' in. But Tar baby, she stay quietly, EN Brer Fox, he lay low. "`Ef you lemme loose, I'll don't knock you AGIN, ' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, EN wid dat he fotch ' it A wipe wid de more udder han ', EN dat stucco. Tar baby, she ain'y sayin ' ', EN Brer Fox, he lay low. "`Tu'n ME loose, fo ' I kick de natal stuffin ' outen you, ' sez Brer Rabbit, sezee, but de Tar Tar-Baby, she ain't sayin ' '. She hilt of the on, EN de Brer Rabbit loose de use it his feet in de same way. Brer Fox, he lay low. The Brer Rabbit squall out dat ef de Tar Tar-Baby tu'n ' in loose he don't *censored* ' it cranksided. EN the he butted, EN his head got stucco. The Brer Fox, he sa'ntered away ', lookin ' December ez inside cent ez more wunner yo ' mammy's mockin' birds. "`Howdy, Brer Rabbit, ' sez Brer Fox, sezee. ` You look sorter stucco UP dis mawnin ', ' sezee, EN the he rolled on de groun ', EN laft EN laft twel he couldn't laff NO mo '. ` I bacon you'll take more dinner wid ME dis time, Brer Rabbit. I done laid into some calamus roots, EN I ain't more gwineter take NO skuse, ' sez Brer Fox, sezee." Here Uncle Remus paused, and drew A two pound yam out OF the ashes. "Did the fox eat the rabbit?" asked the little boy tons whom the story had been told. "Dat's all de fur de tale goes," replied the old one. "He mout, to which agin he moutent. Some say Judge B'ar come ' long EN loosed ' in-some say he didn't. I hear measure Sally callin '. You better run ' long."

The Hollow Men T. S. Eliot (1925) You can take The Hollow Men to the rehab
shop. BwaHaHaHa! To Dilbert....... [smiley=thumbsup.gif]Pernicious Babelcat!


Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah   Lyrics


SNAP!a dee doo-dah, SNAP!a dee ay
My, oh my, what a wonderful day.
Plenty of sunshine headed my way.
SNAP!a dee doo-dah, SNAP!a dee ay

Mister PeckerWood on my shoulder
It's the truth, it's actual.
Everything is satisfactual.

SNAP!a dee doo-dah, SNAP!a dee ay
Wonderful feelin'.
Wonderful day.

SNAP!
I'm quite partial to the >Swedish Chef/Jive translators<.  Here's what the Jive translator did to Wordsworth's Daffodils:

ah' wandered lonely as some Cloud
Dat floats on high o'a' Vales and 'Sup, dudells,
When all at once ah' saw some crowd,
A host uh golden daffodils;
Beside da *censored* lake, benead de trees,
Flutterin' and dancin' in de BREEZE. What it is, Mama!

Continuous as de stars dat shine
And twinkle on de milky way,
Dey stretched in never-endin' line
Along de margin uh a bay, dig dis:
Ten dousand saw ah' at some glance,
Tossin' deir 'haids in sprightly dance. What it is, Mama!

De waves beside dem danced, but dey
Out-dun did de sparklin' waves in glee, dig dis:-
A poet could not but be gay
In such some jocund company, dig dis:
ah' gazed-and gazed-but little dought
What weald de show t'me had brought, dig dis:

Fo' oft when on mah' couch ah' lie
In vacant o' in pensive mood,
Dey flash downon dat inward eye
Which be de bliss uh solitude,
And den mah' heart wid pleasho' nuff fills,
And dances wid de Daffodils.




Quality.[size=24]IF by Rudyard Kipling (Revised Redneck)[/size]


Eff'n yo' kin keep yer haid when all about yo' Is losin' theirs an' blamin' it on yo', Eff'n yo' kin trest yo'seff when all min doubt yo' But make allerance fo' their doubtin' too, Eff'n yo' kin wait an' not be tired by waitin', Or bein' lied about, doesn't deal in lies, Or bein' hated, doesn't give way t'hatin', An' yet doesn't look too fine, no' talk too wise: Eff'n yo' kin dream--an' not make dreams yer master, Eff'n yo' kin reckon--an' not make thunks yer aim; Eff'n yo' kin meet wif Triumph an' Disaster An' TREAT them two imposto's jest th' same; Eff'n yo' kin bar t'hear th' truth yo've spoken Twisted by knaves t'make a trap fo' fools, Or watch th' thin's yo' gave yer life to, busted, An' stoop an' build 'em up wif wo'n-out tools: Eff'n yo' kin make one heap of all yer winnin's An' risk it all on one turn of pitch-an'-tost, An' lose, an' start agin atchar beginnin's An' nevah breath a wo'd about yer lost; Eff'n yo' kin fo'ce yer heart an' nerve an' sinoo To sarve yer turn long af'er they is gone, An' so hold on when thar is nothin' in yo' 'Cept th' Will which says t'them: "Hold on! Fry mah hide!" Eff'n yo' kin talk wif crowds an' keep yer virtue, Or walk wif kin's--no' lose th' common touch, Eff'n neifer foes no' lovin' friends kin hurt yo'; Eff'n all min count wif yo', but none too much, Eff'n yo' kin fill th' unfo'givin' minute Wif sixty seconds' wo'th of distance run, Yourn is th' Earth an' ev'rythin' thass in it, An'--which is mo'e--yo'll be a Man, mah son! Fry mah hide! -

-Rudyard Kiplin'

http://rinkworks.com/dialect/